Almost A Boaz

Almost A Boaz

I recently was asked a very good question: "What do you do with an 'Almost A Boaz'? An 'AAB' is the guy who has everything a woman is looking for in a Boaz...BUT...something is not quite there. It could be a flaw in his character, a difficult dynamic of a potential relationship or simply that you are not emotionally invested.

Whatever the reason, 'that reason' is keeping your 'Az' from being a 'Boaz'. What do you do? 

Now, we all know that no one is perfect, so let's not ask this of every potential Boaz. But not expecting perfection should not lead to compromise in areas that will hurt 'YOU'. This is the biggest mistake I see women constantly make again and again. They excuse every red flag, warning and damming evidence on the guise of "no one is perfect".

A good friend of mine had a saying he always repeated; "Excuses are lies we tell ourselves to get by".

How true this is and has been proven, even in my own life, time and again! Human nature dictates that we would rather a good lie than an ugly truth. When it comes to our Boaz, we will do every mental mind trick to convince ourselves that he is a good thing 'despite' what he is showing us.

I have saying; "If a guy shows you what he is really about...BELIEVE HIM!" He may be honest with you or himself, but the truth of who he is, is coming through loud and clear. We tend to overlook the bad and focus on the good, hoping the bad will magically go away. Why not focus on and deal with the bad? It is the bad that will hurt you and will tarnish everything good.

Pinocchio, the fairy-tale puppet who wanted to be a real boy had these same issues. Pinocchio knew what we should know; Being an 'almost' boy, is not a real boy. 

Although Pinocchio could speak and 'act' like a real boy, his wish would not be granted until he proved himself to be worthy of this status. This proved harder than it seemed as we read how Pinocchio struggled between good and bad choices. Whenever he lied, his nose grew. Soon it was almost too big to hold up! Instead of attending school and doing right, he skipped and was turned into a Jack-Az!

Pinocchio's issues are not unlike your potential Boaz. Though he may have many 'good' qualities, his bad decisions and behavior keeps him from being a 'real' Boaz! Almost just simply won't cut it!

Picture the perfect wedding dress. Elegant, beautiful, flowing with white; gorgeous! Now picture a stain on the front. Is 'almost' prefect good enough? How about eating off an 'almost' clean' dish? Almost takes on a whole different meaning when you put it in  a different context.

Again, I know perfection in people are not a reality, but is heart worth more than a dress? or a dish? 

Jesus said, "The truth will set you free". 

If the truth sets us free, why would you choose to ignore it or make excuses for it? By doing so, you are making yourself a prisoner; the opposite of free. If you ignore the truth of what God, your heart and your mind is telling you, you paint yourself into a corner. You create a self styled prison and hand your 'AAB' the key. You tell him that although you are wrong and 'this' is wrong, i'm going along with it anyway; giving 'you' power over 'me'.

If this is the path to happiness, i'd advise you to be miserable on your own. 

Jesus also said, "A little leaven, leavens the whole loaf". Leaven is a yeast. You cannot sprinkle a little yeast into dough without it penetrating the whole loaf. Likewise, you cannot overlook major issues with your potential Boaz and not expect it to spill over the whole relationship. 'Sorta joyful' is not joyful at all. 'Sorta loved' is not love. The phrase, "selling yourself short", means giving yourself away (selling) very cheaply, for less than its value (short). You are worth far too much to cheapen yourself with 'almost'.

So what do you do? You be patient and grow. Again, you can do bad by yourself, which is better than doing bad and dealing with someone else's bad behavior also. Don't be desperate for love or a relationship. Take the time to build up yourself so when the 'real' Boaz comes along, you will be ready and it will be 'perfect'!

Remember Ruth. Boaz was not her first choice. She was married to another, who passed away. Maybe he was also a Boaz 'type'. Maybe she settled for less, like so many women are willing to do. Whatever the case, when she waited and trusted God, a 'real' Boaz came to her and he didn't need her to perform mental mind tricks in order to fall in love with him. He was all she hoped for and all he appeared to be.

Pinocchio also realized that not only does the truth make your nose shrink back to normal, it also sets you free! When he embraced the truth and lived by the truth, he indeed became a 'real' boy. When you embrace the truth and walk in it and live by it, you will not accept the 'almost' Boaz and wait and look for the 'real' thing!

I wish you the BEST! You DESERVE it!

God Bless
http://waitonboaz.com